Lallyland

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From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

Lallyland (11px-Speakerlink-new.svg.png ¬i/lällɨːləndz/; Dutch: Lalliland [ˈlaːliˌlɑnt](13px-Speaker_Icon.svg.png ¬ listen)) is a sovereign state island north of the Kingdom of the Netherlands. The capital city of Lallyland is Ljukkaen, which is also the largest city on the island. Lallyland is included in the wider cultural region of Scandinavia. Lallyland has an area of 8.806km²  (3.4 sq mi) and a population of 1,200, making it one of the smallest countries in the world. The country is characterised by flat, arable land and rocky coasts, low elevation and a mild climate.

 

Lallyland gained independence from the Kingdom of the Netherlands in 1964, and is an absolute monarchy, currently ruled by Prince Ronald I. He is head of state and appoints the country’s Prime Minister.

 

Next in line to the throne is Prince Jesper-James (born in 2012), the eldest son of Prince Roland I and his wife Princess Sonja. The royal couple have one other child, Prince Palmer (born in 2014).

 

Lallyland is a member of the EU, Eurozone, G-10, NATO, OECD and WTO, and a part of the trilateral Benelux economic union. Officially the only countries to be members of Benelux are Belgium, the Netherlands, and Luxembourg, however Lallyland is included under the Netherlands’ participation as it used to be governed under Dutch rule when Benelux was formed.

A bill legalizing same-sex marriage in Lallyland was approved by Prince Ronald I on 03 February 2015 and co-signed by the monarch and the Prime Minister on 01 March 2015.

 

To fall in line with the rest of the eurozone, Lallyland adopted the euro as its official form of currency. It replaced the guildfranc which was the official currency of Lallyland from 1968 until 2001. Prior to the independence of Lallyland, the country used the Dutch guilder when part of the Kingdom of the Netherlands, and retained the use of the guilder for a further 4 years after becoming its own country.

 

History [edit]

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          Main article: History of Lallyland

 

There is evidence of human habitation of Lallyland dating back to circa 120,000 years ago.

During the Nordic Bronze Age, native Dutch and Danish groups migrated to Lallyland. It is believed that early Germanic languages were brought to the country during the pre-Roman era, but the language evolved into a linguistic cross between Germanic, Roman, and early Saxon dialects, later adopting a form closer to Dutch.

 

Like Switzerland, Lallyland was not invaded during either of the world wars. No invasion plans were believed to have been drawn up by the Germans, with Hitler reportedly deeming the small island “pointless” and “a waste of time.”

 

Officially, Lallyland tries to avoid alliances that might entail military, political, or direct economic action, however in reality it has proven unavoidable for Lallyland to avoid alliances with certain other countries in the area, as it is dependant on foreign imports and aid due to being such a small country. In matters of conflict, Lallyland has a history of remaining neutral.

 

Governance [edit]

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          Main article: Politics of Lallyland

 

The head of state is currently Prince Ronald I, who ascended to the throne in 2009 after the abdication of his father King Hans II due to ill health. By Lallyland tradition, if the ruling monarch abdicates, the next in line to the throne shall ascend to power, but shall keep the title of Prince or Princess until the death of the previous monarch.

 

By tradition, the king (or Prince / Princess in the event of a previous abdication) rules absolutely, but a Prime Minister is appointed to assist with matters of state. The ruling monarch’s has the final word on all new items of legislature. The current Prime Minister is Frank Schmidt. He assumed his role in 2011 following the retirement of the previous Prime Minster.

The most important Ministry of Lallyland is the Ministry of Argiculture and Environment. Since 2012, Sir John Edward Wolters has been appointed for this function. Since the use of special drilling equipment, Sir John Edward Wolters is very known in the oil industry. The oil environmental impact is nihil in Lallyland, since he introduced his new way of drilling.

 

Although the country does not follow a democratic system, a general questionnaire is sent out once a year to all the inhabitants of Lallyland aged 18 or over to assess population morale status. According to the results of recent questionnaires, morale is at all all time high in Lallyland, with 98.6% of citizens reportedly ‘content’ or ‘very content’ with the way the country is governed.

 

Security [edit]

          Main article: Armed forces and law enforcement in Lallyland

 

Lallyland has one of the smallest military forces in the world. Exactly 23 men and 8 women form the trained armed guard at the palace where Prince Ronald I resides with the royal family.

 

There is no official navy or air force in Lallyland, but 5 of the residents of the country are trained naval officers. They have no official duties, but would be required to undertake a naval military defensive role if called upon in times of crisis.

 

Despite there being only 9 active police officers on Lallyland, the country has one of the lowest crime rates in the world.

 

Geography[edit]

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          Main article: Geography of Lallyland

 

Lallyland is an island situated within the North Sea, not far off the coast of Germany and the Netherlands. The closest Dutch municipality to Lallyland is Groningen, and the closest German municipality to Lallyland is Krummhörn, a municipality in the district of Aurich, in Lower Saxony.

 

Climate [edit]

 

The Lallylandish climate, like most of northwest Europe, is maritime temperate, characterised by mild winters and cool summers, and significant levels of precipitation. Unlike Belgium and the Netherlands which have the advantage of being physically joined to other countries, Lallyland experiences strong winds during most months due to its small size, and its positioning within the North Sea. The average temperature is 2 °C (35.6 °F) in January, and 19 °C (66.2 °F) in July; the average precipitation is 67 mm (2.6 in) in January, and 76 mm (3 in) in July). Lallyland is often bombarded with hurricanes in January, and most houses have secure basements for inhabitants to shelter in during severe storms.

 

Economy [edit]

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          Further information: Economy of Lallyland

 

Before the discovery of oil, the economy of Lallyland focused on agriculture. Oil was discovered in Lallyland in 1932 near Uvenwarten Hill, the only area of Lallyland which lies significantly higher than sea level. Since then, large deposits of crude oil and gas were found in the North Sea in the waters around the island. As a result, Lallyland is one of the world's richest country per capita, with a high income economy backed by large natural gas reserves and oil reserves. Due to the country’s exports of petroleum and natural gas, Lallyland boasts one of the most unusual economies in the world, as almost 92% of households are dollar millionaires, with over half dozen billionnaires. As a result, most people living in Lallyland do not work for monetary payment. Food and other produce is imported. A few voluntary essential positions exist on the island which people of working age and suitable levels of fitness share between them on a rotary basis.

 

Energy [edit]

 

          Main article: Energy in Lallyland

 

Despite being one of the world’s main exporters of crude oil, electricity within Lallyland itself is exclusively powered through renewable energy sources, such as offshore wind turbines, solar panels, and water wheels. The country is a member of the International Renewable Energy Agency (IRENA) and is one of the only nations in the world which has been able to achieve 100% renewable energy. As a result, Lallyland’s air quality is exceptionally high.

 

 

Transport [edit]

          Main article: Transport in Lallyland

 

The primary form of transport in Lallyland is cycling. Being such a small country with a mostly flat landscape, bicycles are, for many people, the easiest way to travel. Around two thirds of all trips in Lallyland are made by car, and rest comprise of  journeys made by car and public transport, and walking.

 

There is no airport in Lallyland, however the main port in Ljukkaen runs sea crossings to the Netherlands every two hours, and sea crossings to Germany three times a day.

 

Demographics [edit]

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          Main article: Demographics of Lallyland

 

Life expectancy is high in Lallyland: 84.36 years for newborn girls and 77.54 for boys. The country has a relatively low birth rate, but the population is still growing at an average annual rate of 0.09%

Almost all (98.2%) inhabitants of Lallyland are natural born.

 

Lallyland ranked closely behind Denmark as one of the happiest countries in the world in cross-national studies of happiness. This has been attributed to the high levels of wealth per capita and excellent healthcare.

 

Health [edit]

          See also: Health care in Lallyland

 

Although the overall health of the general population of Lallyland is good, the large number of Lallylanders becoming overweight is an increasing problem. Prince Roland I launched a scheme in 2013 to improve cycle paths and walking trails on the island, in order to discourage people from abandoning their bicycles in favour of cars.

A twice weekly exercise class is run at Vraskan Secondary School focusing on a combination of aerobics for more able-bodied attendees, and a gentler session for the elderly, or people with mobility difficulties.

 

There is one medical centre on the island, comprising of 2 doctors, and one medical bay. Patients requiring emergency treatment are air-lifted to the nearest hospitals either in the Netherlands or Germany dependant on current capacity.

 

Language [edit]

          Main article: Languages of Lallyland

 

The official languages of Lallyland are Dutch (also known as Flemish) which is spoken by a majority of the inhabitants, and Danish, although a number of non-official minority languages such as German are spoken as well.  

English is also used in business, as a working language, and as the language of instruction from primary to tertiary education.

 

Religion [edit]

          Main article: Religion in Lallyland

 

Lallyland is a predominantly Christian country, however in recent years there has been a slight decline of religious adherence. Roman Catholicism has traditionally been the majority religion in Lallyland, but Sunday church attendance has almost halved in the past two decades.

 

Education [edit]

        See also: List of schools in Lallyland

 

Education in Lallyland is compulsory between the ages of 6 and 16, but attending school itself is not compulsory as long as receiving education at a school-level is undertaken. On average, 47% of primary school aged children and 24% of secondary school aged children in Lallyland are home-schooled.

 

There are two primary schools and one secondary school (Vraskan Secondary School) in Lallyland. Due to the small numbers, each primary school has just 2 teachers in addition to the head-teacher, and the secondary school has a total of five teachers. Classrooms are of mixed ages and abilities, but every child is assessed individually and given work appropriate to their needs. This method of tailoring learning to specific abilities has been highly commended by researchers of child development, and academic standards in Lallyland are among the highest in the world, with pupils consistently achieving the highest grades in the International Baccalaureate. 

 

All college and university education in Lallyland is free of charges; there are no tuition fees to enroll in courses. The University of Lallyland is the only university in the country, and offers only a limited range of courses, and lectures are limited. Emphasis is largely placed on independent student learning, although a qualification from the University of Lallyland is considered equal to a degree from any other university in Europe. Students sometimes choose to study in universities in the Netherlands or Germany instead though due to there being a wider choice of courses elsewhere.

 

Culture [edit]

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          Main article: Culture of Lallyland

 

Due to its small size, Lallyland has been vastly overshadowed by neighbouring Denmark, Germany and The Netherlands in terms of culture. One of the oldest buildings on Lallyland is the National Lallyland Theatre, where members of the Yukkun Theatre Group perform, the only professional acting company in the country.

Lallyland Public Library is small but books are imported from the Netherlands on request.

 

Sports [edit]

          Main article: Sport in Lallyland

 

The national sport of Lallyland is frolf (otherwise known as disc golf). Although the game originated in Canada, inhabitants of Lallyland adopted the game as their national sport in 1997. The most famous Lallylander within the sporting world is Felix Dijkstra who won the Lallyland Frolf Championships six years in a row, from 2007 to 2012. He retired from the game in early 2013, and the current Lallyland Frolf Championship title holder is Ben Buskirk who claimed the title in 2013 and retained it in 2014.

On average, around 92-95% of the inhabitants of Lallyland attend the Frolf Championships every year, which are held in the country’s only open air stadium in Ljukkaen.

 

Other Popular Sports [edit]

 

In recent years, the popularity of bowls has increased in Lallyland, and the sport is now taught in schools as part of the Lallyland National Curriculum. Niels Leth is the current holder of the Lallyland Bowls Annual Tournament trophy.

 

Cuisine [edit]

          Main article: Lallylandish cuisine

 

The cuisine of Lallyland, similarly to the cuisine of other Nordic countries and of Northern Germany, consists mainly of meat and fish. Although french fries are reported to have originated in Belgium, it is rumoured that they stemmed from a method of cooking strips of potatoes which was first discovered in a recipe book in Lallyland. The link between this recipe and french fries has not been confirmed.

 

Early Dutch settlers brought with them the idea of simple dishes, and many Lallylanders choose to continue this tradition. Dinners are typically rustic, and traditionally ungarnished. In more recent years, the Danish open sandwiches, known as smørrebrød have gained in popularity, and there are now a few small cafés in Lallyland specialising in these light lunch options.

 

Music [edit]

          Main article: Music of Lallyland

 

Lallyland has a small choir which officially performs at Easter and Christmas mass services in St. Cécile’s Cathedral in Ljukkaen. The most famous singer associated with Lallyland is native born Lallylander Charlotte Vos who hit number 1 in the US music charts and number 3 in the UK music charts with her hit song Everybody Scream in 1979.

 

Literature [edit]

          Main article: Literature of Lallyland

 

A number of notable poets were born in Lallyland, including Adrianus van der Berg, Elian Muis, and Jacobina de Haan.

Adelbert Dirchs, author of the 1989 New York Times bestselling crime novel Pleased to Meet You, Mr. Goebles (Blij u te ontmoeten , Mr. Goebles), was born and raised in Lallyland before moving to Maine, US in 1994.

 

Film and television [edit]

          Main articles: Cinema of Lallyland and Television in Lallyland

 

Lallyland does not have its own TV broadcasting station. Televisions in Lallyland primarily receive broadcasts from both Belgium and the Netherlands (notably from the Dutch TV production conglomerate Endemol), and several German channels in addition.

 

Flag [edit]

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          Main article: Flag of Lallyland

 

The flag of Lallyland is a black background, with a fully red circle in the centre. In the middle of the circle is a blue cross. When Lallyland gained independence from the Netherlands in 1964, a competition was held in the country for the best flag to be designed for the new country. A vote was carried out to narrow the choice down to 10, and the ultimate design was chosen from this shortlist by King Hans II.